Diversity Counseling

Diversity Counseling Interview: Religion, Race and Roles (Part 2)

This is a continuation of a post which describes an interview which purpose was to identify how cultural differences may affect the therapeutic relationship between two people who are different in various ways but particularly in ethnicity/race, religion, and gender.

Roles of Husband/Wife, Child-rearing, and Overall family

When I asked Mike if he was congruent with his cultural group he said, “Absolutely.” He thought American views on family roles are changing but only in theory. He said he feels men are still expected to be the breadwinners and the wife is expected to stay home and take care of the children. He does not consider himself as being a mainstream American though. As for what constitutes a family in his cultural group, he said family consists of a father, a mother, brothers, sisters, grandparents, and very close friends. He was not sure if close friends were considered family to most Americans but he does.

In regards to grandparents he says they are well respected and are there to share their wisdom with the rest of the family. They are perceived as a parent figure and although true in his family, his elderly grandmother is considered “wacky.”

I believe the norm for Americans is to place their elderly parents in nursing homes or assisted living More

Diversity Counseling/ Self Awareness

Diversity Interview: Experiencing Cultural Differences In Counseling (Part 1)

The following paper describes an interview conducted by a Latina counseling student with a White male interviewee named Mike. The purpose outlined is to identify how cultural differences may affect the therapeutic relationship between two people who are different in various ways but particularly in ethnicity/race, religion, and gender.

Mike regards his religion as the most important aspect of his life. Although his role as a White male may have initially impacted perceptions on the counseling student, she discovers the biggest challenge to be his religious beliefs.

Initially, it was obvious that Mike was White but I decided to ask him anyway. “Mike, what do you consider you racial/ethnic identity to be?” He looked perplexed just as I suspected so I politely gave him my reasons to why I asked. His look made me a little uncomfortable. For a minute, I thought perhaps I sounded a little racist or prejudiced. He then replied, “I consider myself a White Protestant.” Part of this answer was not a surprise to me. He is, obviously White although I do not dare guess anymore. However, if I had not asked More

Diversity Counseling/ Session Transcripts and Analysis

Reflections on a Movie: Boys Don’t Cry

Boys Don’t Cry: A Film Critique

Boys Don’t Cry (1999) written by Kimberly Pierce, was based on true life events about the life and death of Brandon Teena, a transgendered individual who lived in Nebraska as a male until it was discovered that he was biologically a female, and was killed in December of 1993. When evaluating the gender based behaviors displayed in this film, initially I made note of its title. This title could be descriptive of a consensus in society that not crying was equivalent to masculinity. Therefore, expression of feeling is a sign of vulnerability and men aren’t supposed to be weak. The over exaggerated masculine behaviors such as the brawls and aggression depicted in this film were clear statements representing the invincibility of a man. Along with the general idea the men are of a privileged class, are the specifics of male vs. female behavior, societal norms, and how much of it is still the same fourteen years later.

Gender-based observations

The movie opened up with Teena cutting her hair short. A short haircut symbolizes maleness. She was now Brandon.
Brandon, drinking beer and smoking cigarettes at a bar (acceptable male behavior) approached Candace and asked her name. This is what men do when they are interested in a female. It is typical for a man to initiate conversation with a female.
Candace giggled when approached by Brandon. She seemed soft and shy. Women are expected to be submissive to advances from a man.
Wearing the male persona, Brandon asserted his respect when another man sat in his chair while he stepped away for a minute at the bar. Men are territorial. That was his space and his woman. He reacted as was expected with physical aggression for disrespecting his space. A brawl broke out at the bar.
Lana wears long red hair with long red fingernails. This is representative of acceptable female behavior. This may be the clear boundary that represented her as the female in the relationship.
Brandon doing push-ups while he’s in jail. Physical strength means power. Males are physically stronger than females.

Gender-based interactions

The interactions between men were somewhat verbally and physically aggressive and demeaning toward women. For example, there was a scene when John was talking to Brandon about Lana and within the same conversation he slapped Brandon across the backside of his head perhaps as a social gesture that meant men can take anything. Men also bragged about their brushes with the law. In fact, there was one scene when Tom was talking about a crime that he committed and Brandon responded by saying, “That’s cool.” It was cool to steal cars. This exaggerated masculinity as manifested by the criminal acts meant being fearless and showing this off amongst each other. In addition, there was a scene during Brandon’s birthday where John told him he was giving Lana to him as a birthday gift, as if she were a trophy, an object that can be tossed around between men. Women were prizes and John basically told Brandon he had earned Lana while also making a note that he could take her back when he said right after he gave the gift, “But remember, this is my house.”

Women were more passive and supportive of each other. It seemed as if they had each other’s back. There were no scenes that demonstrated aggression of women towards each other like some of the interactions between men. An example might be when, John took Candace’s car and left the rest of the group stranded, including Tom. Eventually, John came back and Lana told her friend to hop in the car because John was going to take them to work. There was no scene that showed what the conversation between Lana and John but one can guess that she convinced him to go back to at least pick up her friend so that they can make it to work.

When women and men interacted, the power that men felt they had over women was apparent throughout the movie. Men felt they could cross boundaries with women whenever they wanted. For instance, in one scene John just walking into Lana’s room without knocking and although Lana briefly asserted her discontent with this action she hugged him when he told her all he wants to do was to protect her, as if she couldn’t do it alone.

Sexual, political and societal tension

Societal tension was clearly depicted when almost everyone was having a difficult time consuming the idea that Brandon was biologically a girl, but behaved like a boy. When he was discovered, he was referred to as an “it.” He was asked by John, “What are you?” This was as if what he was doing was inhumane. People were disgusted by Brandon’s actions and even forced his femininity by calling him Teena and raping him. They rationalized there internalizations by saying it was because he was a liar, when it reality it had more to do with Brandon being “different.” The low tolerance to this difference was also demonstrated by the label of “lesbian” that Lana received as a result of dating Brandon. Labels of “faggot” and “dike” were also used throughout to film which is representative of a culture not ready to accept someone who didn’t meet the status quo.

When the two guys discovered Brandon was a women, their reactions were that the only possible path for gender identification was either as a woman or man therefore implying that other gender identities simply cannot exist.

Issues regarding race and class

The entire film represented Whites. There were times that people in the film would be referred to as “White trash.” Falls City seemed like they were low tolerant overall with diversity. If you are not White and heterosexual, you didn’t belong there. Mainstream heterosexual power was clearly demonstrated when Brandon was violated both when his genitalia was exposed to the world, and when he was raped.

In addition there is the question of color. If the rape had been carried out by people of a different color, would things have taken a different course? Would the men have been immediately arrested as opposed to being called to come into the police station in the morning?

Music in the film

The movie depicted a variety of songs that could be masculine, feminine and androgynous. I think as the movie evolved, the music became more feminine. For example, most of the music presented in the beginning of the film represented masculinity as Brandon took on the male role. The music early in the film was raw, thrilling, and hard core. There was something edgy and powerful about it as if it were saying, “here I am, a man and powerful.”

Midway through the film when it was noted that Lana and Brandon were in love and they grieved the fact that Brandon will have to leave for a few days, there was a song about a male and female who missed each other – the first song I had heard during the moving that actually had a female voice in it.

Interestingly the movie closed with the same song, and only song sung by a female, that Lana and her friends sang at the karaoke bar. I was unsure if the song they were singing was that of a female singer but I had the feeling that if was “girly” because they were singing it which such softness. As I listened to the words of the song during the films last scene, it was about a woman and her insecurities and vulnerabilities: the idea of being lonely and scared, which typically men are not supposed to feel. This was clearly a “girly” song.

Thoughts about then and now

What I think makes this movie interesting in terms of observing gender specifics is the fact that this woman was not a conventional “lesbian” Her role was that of a male so as to not cause chaos in the norms of gender roles. She wanted to leave each role (female and male) unbroken.

Also it is obvious that there are “cultural laws” that state and regulate what sexuality means and Brandon was treated as if he had broken the law. When he was reporting to the officer, instead of being treated like the victim, he was victimized and harassed because “she” hung out with boys and kissed girls. The real issue of rape was trivialized because her “difference” was too big to understand. This was quite evident in that John and Tom were not immediately arrested.

It is apparent today how male privilege is still active. The female body in this movie was depicted as something that was easily violated and true masculinity in power showed how Brandon, as a female, was weak and submissive. With this they wanted to show that they are “men” and they have power to do as they please because a female is supposed to conform. This was reassertion of male dominance over women. Although it is manifested differently today, women are still being violated sometimes covertly as in crimes against women, and sometimes discretely as when women make less money in the same type of employment as a man. This movie clearly depicts the oppression of women, gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgendered individuals. It completely sensitized me to how cruel societal rules can be on people who are not privileged. Seeing it through the lens of Brandon help me understand how important it is for me to be a multicultural competent counselor.

Diversity Counseling

The Misery of Racism in the American Life

Are racism, discrimination, and stereotyping something of the past, such as when slavery was prominent in North America? Does it still happen today? The answer to this question would be absolutely yes. Racism, as defined by Kleinpenning and Hagendoom, “is a belief in the innate quality of interethnic differences and a belief in the superiority of one’s own race.” (22)

On the other hand, discrimination “may be defined as the effective injurious treatment of persons on grounds rationally irrelevant to the situation. (Antonovsky 81) Lastly, “stereotyping is the attribution of certain characteristics to certain groups of people.” (Pepinsky 300) The portrayal of racism, discrimination, and stereotyping was portrayed well in the 2004 motion picture film Crash directed by Paul Haggis. Crash so vividly reflects American attitudes toward racial identity and race relations as they occur everyday in North America amongst individuals of all different ethnicities and race.

North America, specifically the United States, is considered by many to be the land of opportunity and freedom. Maasik and Solomon state that the U.S. is a melting pot that offers American citizens the opportunity to all blend together harmoniously. (545) I find that every individual in the United States has either descendents that were once immigrants to this country or are immigrants themselves. Therefore, each individual brings their own culture, attitudes, and beliefs to the “American” table when they enter this country.

Motion pictures like Crash show the numerous amounts of ethnicities that attempt to be melted together in the heart of Los Angeles, CA. When people come across all these different races, how do they know how to socialize with them in order for the cultural harmony to occur? Media, such as movies, is what people turn to. As Omi puts it in his article In Living Color: Race and American Culture, “The power of the media lies not only in their ability to reflect the dominant racial ideology, but in their capacity to shape that ideology in the first place.” (553)

Racial ethnicity many times defines the identity of individuals. It helps people belong to a group where they feel comfortable. As per Merriam-Webster’s dictionary, ethnicity can be defined as groups of people that are classed under common racial, religious, linguistic, or cultural backgrounds. (429) For example, I consider myself to be a Hispanic-American. I was born and raised in the United States, but my parents were born in the Caribbean and South America. Therefore, my ethnicity is a compilation of both cultures intertwined into one. They have both helped create my mentality as a person and grow as an individual. Depending on the situation, however, I may favor one more than the other.

For example, if I attend the annual Puerto Rican parade in New York City, then I would proudly hold up a Puerto Rican flag and not think twice about also bringing along the United States of America flag. However, as a member of the military I stand proudly in uniform and salute the American flag as it waves freely in the air. Therefore, both my Hispanic and American ethnicity creates my unique ethnic identity. A similar situation is portrayed in Crash when the Hispanic detective Ria is telling her partner that her father is from Puerto Rico and her mother is from El Salvador. She recognizes her Hispanic heritage and openly talking about it reflects that she is not ashamed of her Hispanic identity.

“Race is a slippery social concept which is paradoxically both “obvious” and “invisible.””(Omi 551) The first thing that a person sees when introduced to someone is that person’s personal appearance. This first impression will provide a person with simple information as to gender, age, and many times race. This information may help an individual decide what type of behavior they will have with this individual based on the stereotypes already embedded in their head. “These thoughts allow people to justify unfair and destructive practices.” (American Psychological Association).

“A racist negative affect may be learned and motivationally significant.” (Wood 673) Many times the way we may act or the things we say around individuals of certain ethnicities is done unconsciously because we already have racial beliefs stuck in our heads. (Omi 551) I have a personal account that would explain this better. I was hanging out with my boyfriend and his friends who are all white American. They live in central New Jersey in an area where there aren’t many Hispanics or Blacks.

When I was introduced to my boyfriend’s best friend’s girlfriend, the first thing she asked me was, “when did you get to this country.” I just looked at her shocked for a second because I wasn’t exactly sure how to take that question. Was she insulting me or did she really not know? From the look on her face, I could tell that she didn’t mean it in a rude way. I just hadn’t been asked something like that before. I figured that maybe she had interacted with few Hispanics and none were born in America. Therefore, I couldn’t really get upset. Intern, I just smiled and explained that I was born in New Jersey, but that I probably have a heavy North Jersey accent. She agreed and didn’t discuss it further.

Honestly, it made me feel a bit awkward, but since that moment she has never mentioned anything else of the sort. Something similar occurs at the end of Crash when Shaniqua Johnson is rear ended by another driver. The claimant is trying to speak English to her in the best way he can and she yells at him something like “Don’t talk to me unless you speak American.” He was speaking English, but merely had a heavy accent.

Crash definitely portrays the trials and tribulations that people of various ethnicities and races deal with on a day to day basis. Everyone is bound to crash into some type of racism regardless if the person is born in America or in a different country. The one character that really hit home for me was the character of Daniel, the Mexican locksmith. He was a hard working man who was trying his best to keep his family as safe as he economically could.

He worked for a 24 hour locksmith company and seemed to always be on call. His initial job was to change the locks on all the doors of Defense Attorney Rick’s house. The DA’s wife, Jean, was a nervous wreck because her and her husband were just hijacked and had their Lincoln Navigator stolen by two young black men. The moment she saw that a Mexican with tattoos all over was changing the locks on her doors she demanded that the locks be changed again in the morning. She believed that Daniel, the Mexican locksmith, was going to go back to his neighborhood and sell the keys to her house to all his gangster friends. After Daniel finished changing the locks he walked up to Jean and placed all the keys of all the door locks he changed on the kitchen counter.

He just looked up at Jean and walked out. As sad as it is, this is quite common. Some people might have had a bad experience with a person of a certain race and from that day on believe that all people of the same race are the same. It’s hard for them to believe that not all blacks are drug addicts, or that people with tattoos are gangsters, or that Hispanics are thieves, etc.. This appears to have been the case with the DA’s wife. She had such a fear towards people that weren’t her ethnicity possibly because of the experience of the hijacking. In the long run, she realized that her maid, who is also Hispanic, was the only friend she ever had. The maid had been with her for 10 years and was always at Jean’s side when she needed her.

I guess her perception of all Latinos was wrong after all? New York Times Editor Brent Staples best explains this with his own anecdotes in his essay, Just Walk By: Black Men and Public Space. In it he explains how he was considered a possible threat to people of different ethnicities just because of the clothes he wore and the color of his skin. People would look at him and act as if Staples was either going to mug them or physically abuse them. This was odd to him because this had never occurred in his hometown. However, he was in for a rude awakening when he set foot out of that hometown and into the streets of Chicago.

The next incident Daniel had was when he went to change the locks, on a Persian store owner, Farhad’s door. Farhad’s wife could not get the shop’s rear door close and neither could Farhad. Therefore, Farhad called the 24 hour locksmith company where Daniel worked and requested that someone come out to change the lock. Daniel arrived and changed the lock, but realized that the lock was not really the problem. The rear door was actually broken.

He approached the shop owner and explained what he had found. Because of the language barrier, Farhad thought that Daniel was trying to take advantage of him. On the contrary, Daniel was trying to explain to the shop owner that he needed to get a new door because the one he had was broken. Farhad got very upset and started yelling at Daniel. He began to insult Daniel and trying to make him look like a hustler; as if Daniel was going to solicit business for an outside friend. Daniel lost his composure and didn’t even request to be paid for the lock he just repaired. He just walked out.

This incident alone shows that racism doesn’t only occur with white Americans. It happens between people of different cultures and races and shows that even people of all different races lack trust in each other. “A crucial dimension of racial oppression in the United States is the elaboration of an ideology of difference or “otherness.”” (Omi 552) “This involves defining “us” in opposition to “them.”” (Omi 552) Therefore, there is always a bias for the in-group, or the racial group the individual belongs to, and there is a negative affect towards the out-group, which would be considered “them.” This intern creates competition rather than cooperation between “us” and “them.” (Wood 684)

Racism can be a form of hatred because of skin color, language, customs, etc.. (Anti-Dafamation League) It still exists in more subtle and cover forms regardless of the numerous laws that have been passed against it.(Kleinpenning and Hagendoom 21) Michael Omi reminds us that thanks to the media, racism is always portrayed in some way, shape, or form.

Thorough analysis of the motion picture Crash has made me understand that at the end of the day, racism occurs to everyone. This movie greatly reflects how racial identity occurs in America everyday. It just seemed to me that it only happened to minorities; such as Hispanics, Blacks, or Asians; a lot frequently than to other ethnicities. Crash has made me realize that I was wrong. It has helped me open my eyes at the oppressive world we live in. No one is safe from discrimination, racism, or stereotyping. Since this is the case, the absurd myth of the melting pot in the U.S. would problem never occur and if it is forced upon Americans then it will ultimately create more havoc and distress.

References

American Psychological Association. Jan. 2007. 16 Apr 2007 <www.apa.org>.

Anti-Defamation League. 2001. 16 Apr 2007 <www.adl.org>.

Antonovsky, Aaron. “The Social Meaning of Discrimination.” Phylon 21.1 (1960): 81-95.

Crash. Dir. Haggis, Paul. Perf. Sandra Bullock, Don Cheadle, Matt Dillon. Lions Gate Film, 2004.

“Ethnicity.” Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary. 11^th ed. Ed. Springfield, MA, 2004. 429.

Kleinpenning, Gerard and Hagendoom, Louk. “Forms of Racism and the cumulative Dimension of Ethnic Attitudes.” Social Psychology Quarterly 56.1 (1993): 21-36.

Maasik, Sonia and Soloman, Jack. eds. Signs of Life in the USA: Readings on Popular Culture for Writers. Boston: Bedford/ St. Martin’s. 2006

Omi, Michael. “In Living Color: Race and American Culutre.” Maasik 549-559.

Pepinsky, Harold E.. “Stereotyping as a Force of Increasing Crime Rates.” Law and Human Behavior 1.3 (1977): 299-308.

Staples, Brent. “Just Walk on By: Black Men and Public Space.” 1986. 18 Apr 2007. < http://facstaff.uww.edu/carlberj/Journal3.htm>.

Wood, Jeremy. “Is “Symbolic Racism” Racism?” Political Psychology 15.4 (1994): 673-686.

Diversity Counseling

Gender Issues in Counseling: My Gendered Life

I’m a Latina who recognizes the influence of culture, ethnic background, gender and experience in this highly selective, privileged, racist, and sexist country. Included in these influences is the experience of being reared by a highly dominant and sexist Colombian father, at least this was my perception of him, and probably still is to a much lesser degree than while growing up. It was “his house” and I quickly learned that what he says goes. Consequently, I slowly decided, that being oppositional at an early age, was the way that I would express my disagreement with the “rules.” I also do recognize how this has shaped a big part of my life and how I view the world.

In my younger years, I don’t remember ever identifying myself as a girl. I felt like one and was aware that I was female, but as people asked me the rhetorical question, “What are you?” My first thought and response would almost always be that I was Puerto Rican, Colombian or both. Perhaps this was due to the great variations in culture and the confusion as to which I “had” to follow.

Granted, I was well aware of the apparentness of my female gender but it wasn’t until I was in my late adolescence that I began to perceive that who I was, was not just an ethnic background but also a girl; therefore, at that point I identified myself as female Latina. I shortly began to realize and internalize the practices and behaviors that where modeled by my Latino father.

Even today, when I am asked to think and/or describe my upbringing, my father and his disciplinarian style is what I am first drawn to describe. Some who are not familiar with my life may even wonder if my mother was around while I was growing up. Although it she who maintained my sanity at home and who inspired me to achieve the fullest I can in life, it was most definitely my experiences with my father who influenced my considering myself as an independent Latina. Additionally, if I had to operate by any doctrine within that equation, it would proudly be feminism.

In observing and reflecting on the dynamics of my parents, this gave me sense of how dominance and gender are interrelated within systems, and much more when there is a cultural twist to it especially in marriages. I didn’t understand it but I knew it didn’t sit well with me when my mother had to serve my father meals at a specific time every day because “all hell will break loose” if she didn’t. “I pay the bills and what I say goes” was my father’s favorite motto.

Somehow I was conditioned to believe that if I grew up to pay the bills in my house, I had power. However, much to my dream’s demise was the rude awakening of how much harder it was to attain that longstanding power because I was of the wrong gender. Anatomically, I was not male and so I shortly came to realize although not understand, how underprivileged I was and still am and how much harder it was for me to be that powerful.

In an early quest for this supremacy, I engaged in a series of what I thought were societal norms for males. In my early twenties I started a business. I became driven by money. I purchased a house as a young woman in my twenty’s, a two family house because I wanted to be a “landlord.” And I decided to accumulate college degrees

As I was still not feeling very privileged, I also came to experience early on as I was shopping for a house how the realtors and mortgage brokers would face and speak to my boyfriend during the transactions, even though I was the sole purchaser. I really identified with this inequality when the contract agreement was very different the day of the closing and especially so when the mortgage broker on the other end of the phone, (and yes I was to cease the closing until I settled this), was attempting to convince me of the terms that I knew I did not agree on. Perhaps “he” thought I would engage in feminine-like behaviors and not assert my thoughts with convictions. I have to share that I still remember their shocked stricken reactions when I asserted the deal was off if I didn’t get what I asked for.

Needless to say, I was gladly accommodated. Currently, as a proud landlord for 6 years now, with a little more experience, I am now able to giggle when I solicit a contractor for work to be done in my home and he asks me as I open the door, “where is your husband or your father?”

I can’t say though that it has only been but challenging for me as a young woman. I might add that at times being a woman does have its perks, especially when your car breaks down and men stop to offer help. It’s not my favorite thing to say but I do admit that I have used my gender to my advantage as well.

How many men do you know will have a group of 5 men rush within seconds once their car stalls to help push their car to the nearest gas station? How many times can men say they’ve looked out to their window at home and noticed some neighbor has taken the initiative to mow the lawn and trim the shrubs several times each summer? I don’t think many men can share those experiences. However, I must add that although it is nice and I am dearly appreciative that I have one less thing to do, I sometimes struggle with thoughts such as, “Do they think I can’t do it by myself because I’m a woman?”

Chances are, that may be true but having to live in this male dominated society, I do realize that we as women have come a long way. Even though, the progression for equality seems rather slow, it is much better that having to go on a hunger strike and locked in a dirty cell while begging for rights.

In perception after the fact, I do realize that my feelings towards my “dad,” and I gladly say that now because for a long time I couldn’t address him as anything but “father,” have drastically changed. I often wonder if he’s become more sensitized, has come to realize that as he’s aged I have become independent and free from living under his roof; or perhaps I’ve just grown.

Whatever it may be, I admit I sometimes still look at my dad with some resentment for engaging in such dominant behaviors but I am also thankful that these early experiences have allowed me to be comfortable with who I am in this society. That is, with a strong sense of womanhood. Although it is still obvious to me that differences in gender are very real in our social world, I’ve learned that internally reconstructing my thoughts about the way women and men are categorized allows me to live more constructively in the external world. It is also true for me that just acting and doing what women are “supposed to do” in some people’s eyes is much easier; nonetheless, I do manage to find some comfort in that. In fact, from time to time, I find it to be quite amusing to defy the unwritten rules society and culture have imposed on women.